A little while ago I wrote about learning online. That’s cool, especially because it makes the task of learning so much simpler. But sometimes when you’re in charge, you’ll tell someone to go learn, and then wonder about it later. I mean, how can you judge whether someone has learned what they were supposed to? Sure, through testing, but when you’re the boss, you don’t have time to say, “Pop quiz, hot shot.” So what do you do?

Track them! Did you know there is software for training administration in a business or company, and that same software can track each “student’s” progress? It’s like having an extra set of eyes in your employee’s computer! Well, not as creepy as that. It’s like having a kindly butler to update you every time your “student” completes a lesson.

I found out about training administration through ConductIt.com. You can track employees as they receive new educational training, and as they work toward any sort of licensing. So like if you had someone working for you and they needed to be certified in something, you’d get the right program and then be able to watch and see how long it takes them to finish it. That would ensure that your workforce is kept up to date and cutting-edge at all times.

And if someone plays hooky, you’d know enough to justify giving them an F!

I wish we had a learning machine. I mean straight out of sci-fi, the kind of gizmo that could enable a chronic underachiever (Bart!) to become a whiz kid overnight. The next best thing, I guess, would be professional training. Today’s world seems centered on technology. And with the economy in a tailspin, individual entrepreneurship is making a comeback. So learning business and information technology (IT) is probably a good idea. But who has the time?

You do! Just learn online. Like the University of Phoenix. But to really get specialized training, you’ll probably want to go with a company like Global Knowledge (sounds cool, right, like knowing everything? Just call me Faust). GlobalKnowledge.com specializes in IT and business training. If you wanted, you could go to a special ITIL training facility or center. Or — you could train over the net.

How cool is it that we live in a world where learning is no longer limited to the classroom? Just pop online and upload knowledge to your brain! Well, not quite, but we’re getting there, thanks to companies like Global Knowledge.

I want global knowledge! No, universal knowledge! No, multiversal knowledge! No, omnipotence! But wait, where’s the fun in that? Hmm… If I was omnipotent this issue would be so much simpler…